


Tetsuo

by TheRisu



Category: Akira (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Aftermath, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Movie continuity, Other, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Short Chapters, Title is still a joke, Years Later
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-10
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-10 17:49:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 13,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15954437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRisu/pseuds/TheRisu
Summary: After a second explosion, Neo-Tokyo naturally goes downhill with even more unrest. Even after ten years, things just keep getting worse and worse, but at least Kaneda, Kei and Kai still have each other to pull through.But will they?Especially after Kaneda's inner demons compel him to take in an abandoned child, will they?





	1. View

**Author's Note:**

> This started as a series of drabbles, but eventually turned into a little story following the concept presented on my other work, The Last of Kaneda. Therefore, I recommend reading it before getting here, as it's pretty much the beginning of this, but I just thought it would be redundant to post it twice.
> 
> I actually put two drabbles together for this initial chapter, so that's why there's an awkward break halfway.

The room was pulsating.

The walls were cracking, making rather visceral sounds.

The cracks were leaking, oozing.

_Gushing._

Kaneda blinked rapidly, his eyes now wide open.

At first he thought he was just imagining those sounds, and that hazy redness.

Withdrawal, it was probably withdrawal. They told him it wouldn’t be easy.

That was what he had been telling himself for the past weeks, but he couldn’t believe it anymore.

Something was wrong.

As the air continued getting more and more suffocating, he started getting up, and then reached for the light switch.

But there was no light switch.

What his hand met didn’t even _feel_ like a wall.

It was warm. _Fleshy_.

The sounds were getting louder. More discernible. More _real_.

Stretching sounds. Contorting sounds. Rushing fluid sounds.

Growth sounds. Consumption sounds.

The room was getting smaller. The room was _closing_.

There was no furniture. There was no door. There was no escape.

Kaneda opened his mouth to scream, but nothing came out.

Or at least nothing could be heard, because whatever he tried to say was drowned out by a grotesque, distorted wail.

And even despite the distortion, he could still recognize the voice.

Even after so long, it was still fresh in his mind.

And it hurt so much.

It hurt so much that he just stood there, stunned.

He just stood there as the flesh continued advancing, assimilating the room and now his body.

Getting narrower and narrower.

_Crushing_ -

“ _KANEDA!_ ”

Kaneda opened his eyes. Once again widely.

Although this time he was actually awake. His face was soaking wet with cold sweat, and his breath was still a little agitated.

“Kaneda…” repeated Kei, more softly, and then sighed “My _god_ , you scared me…”

It took him perhaps a minute to fully process that he was just having a nightmare, a minute during which he sat up and looked around to make sure everything was back to normal.

Then he finally turned to a still very concerned Kei.

“…Scare you? Why?” he suddenly smirked, as if it actually hadn’t been that much of a big deal.

Kei naturally frowned.

“Are you kidding me? You were shaking like crazy!” she replied, sounding naturally upset, but at the same time trying to keep the softer tone “Kaneda… Kaneda, what happened? What did you see…?”

Upon wiping the sweat off, Kaneda figured it would be better to not play dumb again.

“Nothing… I mean, nothing too serious… just… past stuff…”

Then he cautiously got up, yawning and scratching his head. Looking as casual as possible.

But that wasn’t enough to convince Kei, as she was still frowning while standing up herself.

“What _kind_ of ‘past stuff’?” she inquired, and that seemed to bother him as much as she supposed it would.

“What do you _think_ , Kei?” he inquired back, then smirking again but more bitterly than before “There are some things you just _can’t_ forget, you know?”

And that would have been an incredibly vague statement to anyone else, but not to her.

“Of course I know. I was there too.”

Granted, maybe not as close as he was, but she believed to know enough.

He had done his best to make sense of it back then, he had attempted to describe it to both her and Kai, but they all seemed to be on the same page regarding how utterly bizarre that had been.

And how their lives would never be the same afterwards.

“Sorry…” sighed Kaneda, folding his arms as Kei approached “I just… I had never dreamed about it like that before…”

“And you had never apologized like that before either.” she answered “I think Kai is right. You _are_ getting softer.”

“You cut that out. You cut that shit out _right now_.”

“But there’s nothing wrong with it, you idiot. Just like there’s nothing wrong with having bad dreams every now and then.”

“But I _shouldn’t_ …”

Kaneda paused, and scratched his head again. Now in a more uneasy manner, as if hesitating.

For a moment, it seemed like he would evade the subject again and end the discussion entirely, but then Kei decided to show more support by actually taking his hands, while still looking at him with the most genuine concern.

“It’s been a while since the last time we talked about it, hasn’t it?” she muttered “And even then, we didn’t talk about it _enough_.”

Kaneda looked back at her, and couldn’t help a hint of anguish in his own gaze.

“Let’s talk about it again, Kaneda…”

After all, wouldn’t that be the fairest thing to do?

Ever since that incident, he had been doing nothing but his best to be there for her, and for Kai as well. It had been hard for both of them, as both of them had lost so much that day.

Their friends, their hope, their everything…

But Kaneda himself had lost a lot too, and they almost had failed to realize that his loss was perhaps the most painful of them all.

Something he would keep thinking he could have prevented. Something that would make him feel responsible for all the other casualties.

Something that had been corroding him so much it was already strong enough to torment him in his dreams.

“It doesn’t have to be right now…” continued Kei “But please promise me you will talk to me about it. We got each other’s backs, right? So it doesn’t have- It _can’t_ be always you helping us, without getting any help yourself. You _can’t_ be always strong, Kaneda. And that’s okay.”

Now Kaneda couldn’t help smiling a little.

He just couldn’t believe he was being told that, when he used to be the one who would tell that to…

To others…

“Okay, fine!” he concluded, going back to the lighter demeanor “I’m not making promises though, I’m not good at that, and you should know it by now. I’m just gonna keep it in mind, okay?”

Kei smiled a little herself. Well, that was something. It was better than him feeling pressured and evading her even more for sure.

“Fair enough. Then maybe breakfast will do better than talking for now.” she replied, then turning to the half-open door of the bedroom “I think Kai is already making something…”

“Breakfast would be great, yeah…” began Kaneda, to then glance at the digital clock next to the futons and squint “…at four in the morning though?”

Kei just shrugged.

“We can give it to the other refugees if you don’t want it.”

And then Kaneda sprinted out of the room.

~

The apartment was pretty filthy and run-down, just like the rest of the building, but it didn’t matter. Judging by how things were still escalating in the worst possible way across the city, it didn’t really matter.

They had almost no furniture, but at least there was a little television. That certainly helped knowing what was happening outside to some degree, without having to step out of safety.

“ _Today we commemorate a very important date._ ”

Kai glanced at the screen upon hearing such statement, and approached to turn the volume up.

“Oh, this should be good…”

“ _It is the tenth anniversary of perhaps the worst catastrophe we have ever experienced, since the nearly identical catastrophe that preceded it thirty years prior. Yet another atrocious tragedy that ravaged all the hard work that had been put into the foundations of Neo-Tokyo, leaving nothing but pain and disillusionment. And now, as we can’t help but question the government’s necessity of taking such risk once again, we can only wonder as well… Are our best interests truly being considered?_ ”

“What the hell are you doing listening to that?” yawned Kaneda, entering the living room with Kei in tow.

“This is the first time they talk about it upfront, like they got the whole story, and I just had to see how much they’d bullshit it.” replied Kai, going back to the kitchen to retrieve the breakfast “They’re going to call it a bomb, I bet…”

“You’d call _that_ just a _bomb_!?” exclaimed Kaneda, making Kei have to let out an abrupt ‘Shhh!’ and then cock her head towards the frail figure of little Makiko still sleeping in a corner, which effectively got him to lower his voice “But they had actual stuff recorded…! A lot of people saw it, a lot of people-”

“I know, Kaneda, I know…” groaned Kai, handing over the bowls of steaming rice “But it’s not gonna stop them from trying. They’re just gonna keep covering it up and treating anyone who won’t buy it like they’re nuts. The sooner they sweep it under the rug, the sooner everyone will forget…”

“So they’re just pulling the same maneuver from the first incident, and expecting it to work again.” said Kei, looking and sounding noticeably unimpressed as she began to eat.

“But then… does that mean…” mumbled Kaneda, already with his mouth full “Did they say anything about…”

“Not a single word on Tetsuo.” confirmed Kai, with a frown.

Kaneda frowned himself, sourly swallowing the rice.

“He’s getting swept under the rug too, I see…”

Kei almost pointed out that the program had just started and they weren’t done talking about the anniversary, but then ended up realizing it wouldn’t really help, as chances were they wouldn’t mention Tetsuo at all, just like how they wouldn’t mention Colonel Shikishima’s persistent efforts to prevent the disaster at all.

None of that would be convenient.

All the public needed to know was that the government was incompetent, and instead of stopping their dangerous bomb project when it had already caused enough damage once, they deluded themselves into thinking they could control something that was never controllable to begin with.

And now they wouldn’t be as easily forgiven.

Never mind the horrible psychic oriented experimentation on innocent children that had been happening behind everybody’s backs.

Then again…

Maybe the media actually wished they could investigate further about it, but would keep getting obstructed.

She actually wished _she_ could investigate further herself. She had been left with so many questions, not only about those children, but also _herself_ , her own demonstrated potential…

“So… What are the plans for today?” asked Kai, finally breaking the prolonged silence.

“Checking for helicopters again, most likely. Although we might have to wait for a while until they come back…” replied Kei, turning to give the still sleeping Makiko a worried look “Did you find out anything about her family, Kaneda?”

Kaneda swallowed another impressive mouthful of rice in a dejected manner.

“Almost nothing. From what I got from the other survivors, she only lived with her mom. Her name was… Sumire, I think… she didn’t make it, and they didn’t know about any other relatives…”

“That’s terrible…” sighed Kei, as Kai nodded in sad agreement.

“So she’s all alone! Poor thing…” he added, now looking at the child himself.

He had given her some paper and a pen to keep her entertained when she just arrived, since there wasn’t precisely a lot to watch on the television, and she had already doodled a good bunch of things that were now scattered next to her as she rested, curled up on his futon.

“I don’t think anyone has ever given a damn about her…” continued Kaneda, now frowning rather thoughtfully but also still a bit indignantly “When I helped her… she looked at me like it was the first time someone was actually being nice to her…”

And Kei could only squint in response.

“Kaneda, there’s no way you can be sure of that.”

“Oh, _yes_. Yes, he can.” intervened Kai, folding his arms “ _Of course_ , I get it now! Oh, Kaneda… _Kaneda!_ ”

“What? Why are you getting so sappy all of a sud-”

But before Kaneda could finish his sentence, Kai was already hugging him tightly.

“The _fuck_ ’s gotten into you, man!? Get off!”

“Kei is right, Kaneda! We definitely should talk more about your feelings!”

“Yeah, sure, just get off! And don’t you just stand there having a chuckle, Kei, do something!”

But Kei didn’t comply, and instead kept chuckling.

“Listen… I get it, okay? I get it.” continued Kai, now sounding more serious as he loosened his grasp “But it’s gonna be alright. You already helped her a lot. You already helped her as much as you could, and I’m sure she’s very thankful for that. She’s gonna be alright.”

Kaneda looked at him for a second, and then at the floor.

“Hopefully the helicopters won’t take too long and they will take her to a safer place. You already did your part, and succeeded.” said Kei, starting to suppose what all of this was about.

“And if you’re not convinced enough with that, you could try explaining the situation to her so she won’t think you’re abandoning her when she has to go.” added Kai, now gently releasing him.

Kaneda frowned, yet again.

“It’s my fault. I knew it would happen. I just… thought…”

_I just thought maybe she would make it better._

Kei blinked.

She had heard that.

“Gah, whatever. It’s gonna be alright.” concluded Kaneda, proceeding to stand up and walk away to maybe wash his face.

“You know it!” encouraged Kai, smiling supportively, as he stood up himself to take the empty bowls to the sink.

Kei remained at the table, and seemed to wait until Kaneda left to talk again.

“Past stuff?” she muttered, glancing at Kai as he returned from the kitchen.

“Past stuff.” he replied, nodding in confirmation.


	2. Resolve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei receives alarming news and Kai does some domestic stuff.

“…What do you mean ‘urgent matter’? Where’d she go?”

Makiko opened her eyes, leisurely.

They were still aching from how much she had been crying.

“Well, they’ve been talking about the danchi wreckage on the news so, just a guess, but maybe it’s got something to do with the danchi wreckage.”

Then she turned, but barely.

“Makiko’s building…!”

“Yeah… They said it might have been a terrorist attack.”

“Wh- _Really?_ ”

Then she started to get up, but still quietly enough for Kai and Kaneda to not notice.

“You were around when it happened, Kaneda…” continued Kai, resting his chin on a hand in a visibly contemplative manner “Didn’t you see anything?”

Kaneda sighed.

“The place was already going down when I got there, and the survivors weren’t sure of what brought it about, so I’m not… sure either…”

“Well, wouldn’t you like to find out? With how much the news have been lying and exaggerating just to get those juicy reactions going, wouldn’t you rather go and investigate yourself?” suggested Kai, raising his eyebrows.

Kaneda frowned in response, and seemed to join in with the contemplating.

“If it’s true, and it _was_ an attack…” he mused “Then either one of Kei’s boys is pulling some unauthorized shit, or someone wants to tick her off… or _both_ …”

Which prompted Kai to make a ‘There you have it’ gesture.

“And now you get what she meant with urgent matter.”

“Still though, why didn’t she…?”

“U-um…”

Then both men jolted up at that meek voice, and turned to indeed find Makiko standing before them, and skittishly fiddling with her hands.

“Ah, Makiko… Good morning…” greeted Kaneda, a bit awkwardly since who knew just for how long she had been awake.

“Did you sleep well?” added Kai, smiling warmly.

The child nodded, and then looked away.

“I’m sorry, you were talking…”

“It’s okay, we’re done.” assured Kaneda, glancing at the hour being shown on the news channel that was still going in the background “I already have to go anyway.”

“Don’t forget your lunch this time, I worked hard on it and it would hurt my feelings if you did.” replied Kai, going into the kitchen to retrieve said lunch.

“Sure you did, sure you worked really hard on buying it at the store, you jackass.” jeered Kaneda, following him and thus managing to catch the little box he decided to toss over.

“Do you have any idea of how complex the store selection process is?” he said, pretending to be offended, and then looking back at the child that was still observing them “Say, Makiko! Do you like tamagoyaki?”

“Yes, I do.” she answered, her face lighting up slightly “I like the veggies.”

“Great! Then let’s have some for breakfast!” grinned Kai, as Kaneda began putting his lunch and some other belongings in a bag, on the kitchen counter.

“Didn’t you already have breakfast earlier with me and Kei?” he remarked, and Kai simply ignored him and went towards the fridge to get the eggs and start cooking.

Meanwhile, Makiko had approached to take a curious look at Kaneda’s bag, and Kaneda realized just in time to close it before she could see anything that would require tortuous explaining.

“Are you going to work, Mister Kaneda?” she asked, as he grabbed a jacket that was already lying on the counter and put it on.

“From nine to five. Kind of a pain, I know, but at least it’s something I’m good at.” he replied, with an emerging smirk, and then gently placed a hand on her shoulder “Bear with Kai, okay? I’ll try to come back earlier if I can.”

“Okay…” she answered, with another timid nod.

And Kaneda could tell she was a little sad about him leaving, but at the same time understood.

“Don’t worry, man, we’ll be fine.” intervened Kai, leaning in while whisking the eggs “Now go before you’re late again!”

“Gotcha! See you two later, then!” concluded Kaneda, finally opening and crossing the front door.

Makiko kept staring in his direction, even after he fully disappeared.

For just a few minutes, however, since her curiosity got sparked once again as soon as she heard the sizzle of the frying pan, on which Kai had just applied the oil.

“Everything alright?” he asked, upon seeing her approach “Do you want to draw some more?”

Makiko shook her head.

“Can I help?” she asked, in return.

“Oh, of course!” he replied, then glancing at the bowl “I was going to pour the mix in, do you want to do it yourself?”

“Okay.” she nodded, yet again, but now displaying more energy than before, with a faint hint of aggressive determination.

She clearly liked helping.

“Be careful though…” warned Kai, as she took the bowl and effectively did as told with extreme care “There we go, thank you!”

And just as he expected, she actually smiled a bit.

He used to think it was just Kaneda. He used to suspect it could be the impact of Kaneda’s loss, of Kaneda’s self-inflicted sense of failure, messing him up and making him see Tetsuo’s shadow everywhere.

But now that he had spent a good while around this child, he was starting to gather the signs and realize.

Makiko was a pretty melancholic seven-year-old. Even if her gloomy demeanor most likely stemmed from her home’s destruction and her mother’s death, there was something concerning about her hushed tone and profuse apologizing.

She seemed to be afraid.

“Okay, now we’re adding the veggies… Are you ready?”

Makiko cupped her hands around said veggies, a small assortment of diced green onions and carrots, and waited.

“Three… two… one… _GO!_ ”

And down they went, as carefully as the mix did.

“Perfect! Now I just have to roll it up, so you can go set the table if you want.” supposed Kai, and Makiko once again complied immediately.

Which made him suddenly feel just a little bad.

Was she actually used to always do as told? Had she been ordered around before?

He was inevitably intrigued, but also thinking that maybe it was better to not know. She was definitely dealing with some baggage, and that was already distressing enough.

No wonder Kaneda had taken her in like that.

It wasn’t just because of Tetsuo, Kaneda himself knew what it was like.

To be a forsaken child.

All of them, really.

All of them had been forsaken children to some degree.

They just never bothered to acknowledge it.

But anyway…

He had just achieved a neatly shaped tamagoyaki. And if that wasn’t a peak of adulthood, he didn’t know what else could be.

“Breakfast’s ready!”

Makiko was already sitting at the already arranged table when Kai walked over with the food and sat down next to her.

She was staring intently at the television.

And that wouldn’t have bothered him, if they weren’t _still_ addressing the building collapse on the news.

“God _damn_ , isn’t there anything else to make a fuss about?” he scowled, reaching out to grab the remote upon taking notice of the poor child’s mournful look.

“ _The structure fell apart by itself, I swear! It was the wrath of Lord Akira!_ ” whimpered a witness, before he changed the channel.


	3. Speech

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some reflecting on the roof.

The night was teeming with fiery uproar, as the rampant parade continued advancing through the ruined street.

Kaneda returned from the vending machine with two cans of beer, and reclaimed his seat next to Kai.

“I can’t believe you’re getting out of one vice just to get into another.” snarked Kei, as he started drinking without hesitation.

“You may take us away from the road, but we will never stop living on the edge.” replied Kai, somewhat poetically.

“I’ll drink to that.” added Kaneda, raising his can “Happy tenth anniversary, Neo-Tokyo. Or whatever’s left of you.”

“Happy tenth anniversary!” chimed Kai, also raising his can, and then taking a gulp himself.

Kei sighed, but with a smile. Even after so long, they still could get so ridiculous sometimes.

But that was why she loved them, she supposed, as she kept spectating the parade from the roof.

What a wonderful spot to spectate. It had such a perfect, panoramic view of all that magnificent anarchy.

“Remember when we thought we would part ways and go on with our lives like we didn’t just see some third eye opening shit?” smirked Kai, leaning back.

“Those were the days.” replied Kaneda, smirking back at him, but then gradually switching to a more pensive expression “And now they’re so far away…”

And Kei didn’t know how to feel. On one hand, the way they were becoming the adults they used to deride was a little amusing, but on the other…

That adulthood had started too soon. They had been pushed into it by ruthless, _unfathomable_ circumstances, just like herself.

And maybe that was what had been keeping them so closely knitted.

No…

That was _definitely_ what had been keeping them so closely knitted.

“Do you think…” wondered Kaneda, all of a sudden “…the government’s still going with that psychic crapshoot?”

Kei frowned.

“Hopefully not. It doesn’t seem like they got any more promising subjects, at least.” she said, albeit with a bit of doubt in both her look and tone.

It was impossible to be completely sure. Ever since the last incident, it had been getting harder and harder to get them to lower their guard.

But she would keep trying. She _had_ to.

Not only for the remaining subjects, or new subjects, that could be hidden somewhere in those depths, but also the current, surfacing generation of rebels that had been under her care.

She was the only veteran left. Their leader. Their guide. She couldn’t let them down.

_She just couldn’t let them down._

“Well, how lucky can they be?” intervened Kai “I mean, they had to wait thirty years until they found Tetsuo… It must be some really rare thing, right? Like some rare talent…”

“Yeah… We didn’t even _know_ he had it until he bumped into that… _kid_ …” replied Kaneda.

And then both fell wistfully silent, much to Kei’s concern.

There was always a time in which they would helplessly reflect upon how different things could have been. How a single wrong turn could change everything so quickly and drastically, how none of _that_ would have happened if they simply watched over _him_ -

Even after ten years, they just couldn’t stop dwelling on it.

“I hope he’s okay…” muttered Kei.

Much to their surprise.

“Tetsuo, I mean…” she confirmed, after they looked back at her “He didn’t exactly _die_ , did he? The children… They told you they were taking him somewhere else, somewhere safer… Didn’t they, Kaneda?”

Kaneda looked down.

“I wish I knew _where_ …”

Then he took yet another gulp of his beer.

“I trust them.” continued Kei “Maybe their course of action wasn’t the best, but they took the responsibility and did everything they could to protect everyone, including him…”

“I’m sure they did.” agreed Kai, with a nod.

Though mostly because he was aware of that sort of relationship Kei had with them, and thus trusted her judgement.

Besides, a little bit of optimism wouldn’t hurt.

“Do you think…” wondered Kaneda, once again “…he’s thinking about us right now, while we’re thinking about him?”

“I’m sure he is.” agreed Kai, once again “Maybe he can even see us…”

He had lifted his head to stare at the sky, at the stars that could make it through the light pollution.

“Would be a fun show, just these losers getting wasted.” jeered Kaneda.

“Hey! Hey, Tetsuo!” shouted Kai, still staring at the sky “You better aren’t getting wasted too, wherever you are, because then you have nothing to laugh at!”

“Damn straight, you tell the son of a bitch!” shouted, in turn, Kaneda.

And Kei could only sigh and smile again, as she approached to sit with them.

“You know what? I’m glad we didn’t part ways and go on with our lives…” said Kaneda, after taking the final gulp and throwing the can away “I don’t know what you guys would have done without me.”

“I love you too, Kaneda.” replied Kai, patting his back and then getting up to go throw his own can into the corresponding bin, next to the vending machine.

Leaving him and Kei alone for a moment.

Perhaps intentionally.

“So… How did the investigation go?” asked Kaneda.

He knew she had been wanting to discuss that, waiting for a good opportunity.

Kei frowned again.

“Nothing but plain scaremongering.”

“Go figure.”

“All the survivors insisted that it was just a case of structural failure, not to mention how old the building was. There wasn’t any evidence of explosives either.”

“Well, at least that should settle that nobody’s after you…”

“They have been doing well at the nearest shelter… which _isn’t_ this one.”

Then Kaneda blinked, and turned. Kei was still frowning.

“The helicopters will be here sooner or later, Kaneda. Have you talked to Makiko?”

Meanwhile, Kai was still keeping his distance. He knew that one issue would be brought up eventually, and he knew he would want to support both sides, and therefore couldn’t get involved without making the situation more stressful.

So he just watched from afar.

“I haven’t gotten the chance yet…” mumbled Kaneda, once again looking down.

“ _Good._ ” replied Kei, making him look back at her, looking clearly taken aback “Because, if you don’t mind, I would like to do it myself.”

“What…? But, Kei…” continued mumbling Kaneda “…I am the one who bonded with her, shouldn’t I…”

“We can do it together if you want. She certainly would feel more comfortable with you around.” admitted Kei, as Kai placed his hands on his cheeks with his eyes widened in the background.

“Well, I mean… sure…” sweatdropped Kaneda, and Kei’s frown seemed to sharpen.

“What? Can’t I just help you because I’m worried about you? I know this is difficult for you, Kaneda, and I don’t really blame you. So let me soften the blow, will you?”

“Okay, okay! Jeez…”

But Kaneda wasn’t actually bothered by that. He was rather going back to smirking, to then get closer to Kei and put an arm around her.

“You’re so cute when you’re dead set on helping me.”

“Oh, shut up…” replied Kei, smirking herself “At the end of the day I don’t know what _you_ would have done without _us_.”

And then Kai laughed in the background, and Kaneda reached out to retrieve the can he had discarded and throw it at his face.

“Worth it!” he hollered, after getting hit.


	4. Action

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some more self-contemplating Kaneda who also bonds further with Makiko.

Kaneda exited the elevator, let out a heavy yawn, and resumed his return to the apartment.

He couldn’t believe himself. He used to be such a night owl, and now he was getting tired at eleven. _Eleven_. He couldn’t even hold up until midnight. For shame.

Maybe it was the beer, or exhaustion from work kicking in, or a combination of both. All of those were fair possibilities.

But he still couldn’t help feeling a little frustrated about it.

And he still couldn’t understand how Kei, who also had a job, was still wide awake when he left. Maybe it was some kind of revolutionary adrenaline.

Or he was starting to think nonsense.

Either way, he almost got lost in the hazy confusion of seemingly labyrinthine hallways and identical doors, but it only lasted a few minutes. He eventually found the corresponding door, and resignedly wished himself good night in advance as he entered.

The protesters were still making a racket outside, and he could only wonder why Kei hadn’t just attended the parade if she was so intent on watching it.

Maybe she would rather spend the anniversary with him and Kai, since it _was_ sort of _their_ anniversary too.

For everybody else, it was the day they stopped falling for Neo-Tokyo’s promises of a brighter future, and opposition went berserk.

For them, it was so much more…

And ten was such a big number. Time really could fly.

But _either way_ …

“……”

Kaneda frowned.

Then he rapidly passed the bedroom, to head for the kitchen instead.

He had just decided that this drowsiness was bullshit, and he was going to fix it and go back. _It was their anniversary_. He had to be there until the very end. And maybe one or two cans of coffee could do the trick.

So he walked into the living room, that was in turn connected with the kitchen, and it was then that he realized that the lights were already on.

Which could only mean one thing, that he immediately confirmed upon startling her with his sudden arrival.

“Mister Kaneda!”

Makiko was awake.

She was sitting on Kai’s lent futon, with her legs tucked against her chest and her arms around herself, her eyes showing a glimmer of distress.

“Makiko!” exclaimed Kaneda himself, scooting over “Are you okay?”

Makiko then looked down, and seemed to curl further into a ball.

“I can’t sleep…” she replied.

And that was enough for Kaneda to make an educated guess.

“Did you have a bad dream?”

Which did indeed make her look back at him, and nod in that withdrawn, somewhat ashamed manner of hers.

“Well…” he continued, smiling as reassuringly as he could “It’s alright, okay? It was just a dream, nothing’s gonna… What was it about anyway? Do you wanna talk about it?”

Makiko kept looking at him as she fell silent, in what appeared to be a hesitant pause.

Then she looked back down.

“Mama…”

Kaneda was already sitting beside her. Figuring out how to handle the incoming situation, because this was a kid, and one always had to be careful when talking to kids.

And he sure had zero experience in that particular field.

“Mama’s not coming back, is she…?”

But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t try.

There was nothing more painful than grieving alone, especially while being so young.

“I’m sorry…” he replied, putting a hand on her shoulder just like before.

And that was all he could articulate.

And it was awful, because he _knew_ how she was feeling, he _knew_ what she was going through. He just couldn’t find the proper words.

It was complicated.

“It’s my fault…” muttered Makiko, after another pause, and making him react briskly.

“Wh- _No_ , it’s not! It was an accident, Makiko, and there was nothing you could…”

Then he stopped. Was it really okay to say _that_ of all things?

“No, no, it’s my fault…” insisted the child, lowering her head “I was mad. Mama made me really mad, so I… I wanted bad things to happen… to mama…”

And she was already tearing up again, and igniting Kaneda’s guilt-ridden protective urges again.

“No… Makiko, listen… Listen, okay? You always feel like that when you get mad, you can’t help it. It’s okay. But this was an accident, you had nothing to do with it. It’s _not_ your fault.”

He was no longer just patting her shoulder, he was pulling her closer, wanting to hug her, wanting to tell her that everything was going to be alright even if it would be most likely a terrible lie.

And even despite her astonishment, Makiko was yielding. Makiko was reaching out, almost gratefully. Willing to accept that lie, not even caring about it being a lie.

When they realized, they were already embracing each other.

“I didn’t want that… I didn’t want that to happen…” she sobbed, burying her face into his chest as he held her tight.

“I know, I know…” he replied, surprisingly softly “It’s okay… It’s not your fault…”

And he kept saying it. He kept saying it wasn’t her fault, under his breath, a couple of times more.

Perhaps because he needed it, too.

He needed to hear that it wasn’t his fault. Even if it was just coming from himself.

Or rather, _especially_ if it was coming from himself, because no one had been harder on him for all that past stuff than himself.

Either way…

“What’s going to happen now, Mister Kaneda?” inquired Makiko, still pretty brokenly “Where am I going to go?”

Kaneda winced for a second.

He knew where.

If she was truly an orphan with no other relatives that could, or _wanted_ to take her, he knew _damn well_ where.

The memories of that miserable place were already flashing through his mind, making him frown. Even if it would be a different place, how different could it be?

Nobody cared about them. Nobody cared about forsaken children.

“Mister Kaneda…?”

Kaneda looked down, right as Makiko was looking up.

She almost seemed to be able to sense that something was troubling him.

“I’m… not sure, Makiko…” he answered.

Another lie. An even worse one.

Makiko curled up again in a clearly dejected gesture, which felt like a punch in the gut that he definitely had coming.

“But don’t worry, I…” he fumbled, trying to smile “I’ll be with you… Even if you have to go, I… I won’t let anyone take you anywhere bad…”

“You promise?”

“………”

Kaneda took a moment to get a finally detailed look at her. At her short brown hair, at her pale skin, at her worn-out clothes, at her sad eyes, at her overall fragile appearance…

He believed to see a faded bruise as well, but hoped to be wrong.

“I promise.”

And told yet another lie.

Because he wasn’t good at keeping promises.

_But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t try._

“Now let’s get some Kit Kats.” he concluded, slowly pulling away and getting back up.

“Huh?” blinked Makiko “But I already had, and Mister Kaisuke said…”

“Mister Kaisuke doesn’t have to know.” smirked Kaneda, going towards the kitchen as the child gasped and covered her mouth with both hands “It’ll be our little secret.”


	5. Livelihood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei investigates the presumed terrorist attack, and discovers more than expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case anyone's weirded out, yep, I changed the title. This one's final though.

“ _She only lived with her mom. Her name was… Sumire, I think…_ ”

Kei frowned.

“ _She didn’t make it, and they didn’t know about any other relatives…_ ”

Even after a while, Kaneda’s words were still reverberating. Still refusing to leave her mind be.

She had already finished gathering all the information she needed to confirm that the terrorist story was indeed false, and also making sure to tell the survivors that even if the collapse had no connection with the current unrest, nothing would change. Her shelter would still provide as much assistance and support as possible. It was _still_ a tragedy.

And that statement would have given the case some perfect closure but, _even after a while_ , Kei was still there.

Kei was still standing in the middle of the monochrome lobby, thinking about those words.

And actually questioning their veracity.

Actually _doubting_ Kaneda.

“Miss…? Is everything alright?” asked Mrs. Sato, one of the survivors she had been talking with, upon noticing that somewhat eerie frown.

“Ah, yes…” replied Kei, promptly snapping out of it “I was just remembering another important thing I had to discuss with you…”

“Oh? What is it?” intervened Mrs. Yasuda, another survivor.

And Kei was already feeling bad. Already getting upset with herself, because she had trusted both Kai and Kaneda for years. They probably had become the _only people_ she could fully trust.

“It’s about one of the casualties. A woman named Sumire.”

But now she couldn’t help _suspecting_.

She couldn’t help wondering if Kaneda actually wanted _no one_ to take Makiko away from him.

“Sumire? Uuuh… I don’t recall anyone with that name…” replied Mrs. Sato, then turning to Mrs. Yasuda “Do you?”

“Hmmm… no, I don’t think so…” mused Mrs. Yasuda.

“She means Miss Mihara.” clarified Mrs. Oguchi, yet another survivor, rather snidely.

“Oooh, of course!” exclaimed Mrs. Yasuda “Sumire Mihara! My goodness, even now I keep forgetting her name…”

“I don’t blame you, she was always just Miss Mihara to me…” said Mrs. Sato, with a hint of embarrassment “Poor thing…”

“May she rest in peace!” added Mrs. Yasuda, with a solemn nod.

“So you did know her.” continued Kei “Did she have a daughter, by any chance?”

“One daughter, yes. She was a single mother.” replied Mrs. Oguchi “Why? Has she been hiding in your shelter?”

Then Kei blinked, in slight surprise.

“Actually, yes. One of my partners found her at the disaster area…”

“The biker, right?” inquired Mrs. Sato, making everyone turn to her “The man who rescued her, I mean. He was dressed like a biker…”

“Ah yes, that man!” said Mrs. Yasuda, clasping her hands “He heard her crying and went in, right before the rubble fell on her… He’s truly a hero!”

“That would be my partner, yes…” sighed Kei “He brought her to the shelter because no one could take care of her, according to him, but since he can be pretty… _hasty_ sometimes, I thought…”

“Oh no, he’s right. We already have our own children to deal with.” stated Mrs. Oguchi.

“I mean… I’m sorry, I know it must be difficult for little Makiko, but…” hesitated Mrs. Sato, and Mrs. Yasuda just shook her head.

“There must be _some_ relative that can take her in. We have no idea because Miss Mihara would always say things like that she was alone in the world and nobody understood her, but it can’t be that hard to track _someone_ down!” she said.

“I wouldn’t be so sure of that, chances are none of them wants anything to do with her.” said Mrs. Oguchi, and Mrs. Sato gasped.

“Nobuko…!”

“What? I’m just telling it how it is. Sumire Mihara wasn’t precisely the nicest person.”

“Nor the most _stable_ …” added Mrs. Yasuda.

Kei squinted.

“What do you mean?” she asked.

“Weeell…” continued Mrs. Yasuda, then leaning forward and lowering her voice “I think the incident with her husband might have… _affected_ her a little too much…”

“Fiancé.” corrected Mrs. Oguchi.

“Fiancé, yes…” nodded Mrs. Yasuda.

“Oh my…” muttered Mrs. Sato “What happened?”

“You _don’t_ know?” scowled Mrs. Oguchi.

Kei kept squinting, listening attentively.

And already berating herself for doubting Kaneda.

Already asking herself _how_ she could do such thing.

“Of course she wouldn’t, she hadn’t moved in yet…” replied Mrs. Yasuda “It was such a _scandal_! I don’t think we’ll ever have anything else like _that_ in a long time!”

“Just tell them what happened already.” said Mrs. Oguchi.

And Kei was still listening, but also still contemplating.

Kaneda…

Kaneda was trying to cope. Kaneda was still struggling with a good bunch of inner demons, and it was hard. It was _very_ hard. And Kaneda was aware of it.

“Okay, so… They were going to get married. They were pretty much husband and wife already, they just had to go through the ceremony. And they were really happy, and everything was perfect, but one day…”

Kaneda had been doing his best to not let it consume him. To not let it cloud his judgement. He knew better.

“One day she got pregnant.”

Maybe he had taken some comfort in looking after Makiko, but only because of how _genuinely alone_ she was.

“And he went _ballistic_. Because, like… they had been waiting for _it_ , you know? They had promised they wouldn’t _do it_ until after getting married… soooo…”

“ _Oooooh…_ ”

Kaneda could recognize that.

Kaneda could recognize that right away, because he had already seen it before.

Even if she didn’t know everything about it, she could tell that much.

_And she still had doubted him._

“So he left her?”

“He left her, yes. That was when she lost it.”

Kei looked down. The three women were suddenly so absorbed into the gossip that nobody noticed anything this time.

“Then Makiko… she is…”

“God’s work? Yes, she is.”

“Wh- _God’s work!?_ ”

Not even the cracks that had been silently creeping their way all over the walls.

“According to her, at least. She kept insisting that she was still a virgin. I think she always had some… _unusual_ beliefs, but that sure took the cake. And it just got worse from there.”

“She said she had gone through some enlightening experience, that she had a mission.”

“And then she started preaching about the blatant corruption of the world, and how someday it would be ‘purified’…”

“As in destroyed.”

Kei couldn’t even discern who was saying what anymore. Everything was becoming too hazy.

“And of course nobody wanted to listen to her, because she was just so obnoxious. And she hated that. She hated how ‘hopeless’ we were, and how she had to ‘endure’ it.”

Then the cracks started to ooze.

“She was always so bitter and upset… She must have taken it out on Makiko a lot…”

“Oh, she _definitely_ would take it out on Makiko. Haven’t you seen the way she flinches sometimes?”

“Oh dear… poor Makiko…”

“Poor Makiko indeed…”

Kei could feel her head suddenly pounding, making her frown again.

“I think she even tried to run away once…”

“Wouldn’t be surprised if she did.”

“.......”

The walls were no longer white.

“I wonder…”

The walls were red.

“I wonder if Miss Mihara was trying… to _trigger_ something…”

The walls were purple.

“I mean… I don’t know, it just seems like she used to believe in doomsday…”

The walls were flesh.

“…and if she also believed that her child was God’s work… then maybe…”

Everything was flesh.

“… _maybe_ …”

At least until Kei woke up, and found herself back in the bedroom, with Kaneda waking up next to her.


	6. Effort

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaneda and Kei have a moment.

“ _Went grocery shopping with Makiko_ …” read Kaneda, then squinting at the little face that had been scribbled on a corner of the note, and scratching his head “What time is it even…?”

“Almost midday.” replied Kei.

She was standing next to the balcony window, while Kaneda was leaning against the kitchen counter.

“Almost midday, I see…”

The television was off for once. The two empty cans of coffee, still on the table.

The usual beginning of a Saturday.

Kaneda took a moment to smile at an unfinished drawing Makiko had left on the counter, of a bear and a rabbit on a car, and then turned back to Kei.

“Something weird happened, right? Like, psychic kind of weird.” he said.

Kei didn’t answer this time.

“Because you’re staring into space.” continued Kaneda “I know you well enough to assume you’re staring into space right now, and whenever you’re staring into space, you’re thinking about psychic things.”

And it was true.

There was a deeply meditative gleam in her eyes.

“Did you see it, Kei?”

And a remaining hint of fear…

“ _Did you see Tetsuo too?_ ”

Then she blinked and turned, rapidly.

Kaneda smirked in response.

“See, I told you.” he said, crossing his arms “Why were you trying to hide it from me? If I shouldn’t feel bad about having nightmares, why should you?”

Kei sighed.

“It’s not that, it’s just…” she began, then frowning “How did you even get it so accurately?”

“Well, to be honest… I actually saw you there for a second…” replied Kaneda, frowning himself, but in the more puzzled way “And it’s not even _that_ weird at this point, with all the shit we went through, but… I guess it’s kind of a shock to spend ten years without anything happening, and then suddenly getting hit again like, right the fuck out of nowhere…”

“I know…” lamented Kei “That’s why I didn’t want you to know. I thought you wouldn’t appreciate that I might have entered your mind by accident…”

And she was looking so disturbed. So utterly, understandably disturbed.

Kaneda clearly wasn’t the only one who had been putting up a strong front.

“Is _that_ what you have been seeing in your dreams, Kaneda? Is that… Is it really…!?”

“It _is_ Tetsuo, yes. Well, _was_. I want to believe he’s not… dealing with _that_ anymore…”

“Kaneda…”

Kei approached, as Kaneda proceeded to do the same, until they were close enough to hold hands again.

“I guess I have no choice now, huh?” he smirked “Now I _gotta_ tell you everything because if I don’t, you’re gonna see it anyway.”

“Don’t be like that, you know I wouldn’t _mean_ to.” she replied, a bit indignantly “If I could… learn more about it, about how these… _powers_ work, I would…”

“I’m sure there’s a way. We’ll figure it out.” reassured Kaneda, as his features softened into a more soothing smile “We got each other’s backs, right?”

And Kei could only smile back at him, even if she was still a little shaken.

“Right…”

Kaneda was slowly putting his arms around her, and she was slowly doing the same.

“Kei, I… I’m sorry for making things so hard for you lately. I’m sorry about Makiko. We talked a bit last night, because she couldn’t sleep, and I think she gets it. I think she already knows that she has to go, and that it’s for her own good, so you don’t have to…”

“Shhh, it’s okay…”

_We can discuss that later, don’t blow it now, Kaneda._

That was probably what she was thinking, seemed to suppose Kaneda.

But it was actually something different. Something completely different.

“I still would like to talk to her anyway.”

Kaneda blinked in surprise.

“I feel like I should.” continued Kei “Both you and Kai have been looking after her, and I…”

Then he shook his head, still smiling and securing his gentle embrace.

“There’s been a lot going on, and you have enough on your plate.” he replied “Hell, I didn’t even ask any of you first, I didn’t even consider that none of us knows _shit_ about kids… It was an impulse decision. A pretty damn stupid impulse decision.”

“Well, pretty damn stupid impulse decision or not, I still want to contribute to it. After all the things you’ve done for me… it’s truly the least I can do…”

“Kei…”

“No, _shut up_. I’m doing it, you heard me? I’m doing it because I already owe you _way too much_ , and I have to start paying.”

Then he chuckled.

“Okay, okay, knock yourself out.” he concluded, pulling her closer as she rested her head on his shoulder.

“You always take everything as a joke, you dork…”

“Not everything, just whenever you think you owe me, as if being with you wasn’t enough for me.”

Then Kei couldn’t help snorting.

“Alright, but you _really_ are a dork, that was the dorkiest thing I’ve ever heard.”

“But you _liked_ it, didn’t you? So that makes you a dork too, _you dork_.”

“Oh my _god_ …”

And because they didn’t have any couch to slump on, they just ended up sitting on Kai’s futon, that was still in the living room.

Wrapping themselves into a heartening snuggle.

A deserved respite.

It almost looked like they were about to fall asleep again, but then Kei decided to speak again.

“Kaneda…?”

“Hm?” muttered Kaneda, looking back at her.

“Thank you…”

Then he smiled again.

“Oh? For what?”

Kei shrugged.

“I don’t know, everything I guess…”


	7. Mindfulness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei talks to Makiko and a surprise ensues.

“We need to talk, Kai.”

“Ah? About what?”

“About this store-bought bullshit you’ve been pulling on me.”

“Ooooh, _that_ bullshit, alright.”

“Why do you keep getting that half-assed, prepackaged crap for lunch when everybody knows you actually have some talent for cooking?”

“Because I already make breakfast and dinner myself, it’s only fair.”

“Come on, man, you know how much I’d like a homemade lunch to show off at work!”

“But would it really count if it’s not from your wife?”

“Eeehhh, it still would be worth showing off…”

“Aw, Kaneda…”

“Don’t give me that look though.”

Kei smiled in amusement, as she kept listening to Kai and Kaneda’s banter from the other side of the counter.

They had just finished having lunch, and now Kai was washing the dishes.

The television was still off.

Makiko was sitting at the table, resuming the drawing she had started earlier.

Kei seemed to ponder, upon turning to look at her, and then began to approach.

The atmosphere was overall tranquil. Maybe now would be a good time.

The sooner the better…

“Hey…”

Makiko blinked, and raised her head to face her. Kei was smiling, as amiably as possible.

“What are you drawing? Can I see?”

“……”

But it didn’t seem to be enough, because Makiko shrank in response, and subtly covered the drawing by resting an arm on it.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to show me.” continued Kei, proceeding to sit next to her “I’m sorry, I don’t think we’ve met properly. You’re Makiko, right?”

Makiko nodded.

“I’m Kei. We’re friends with Kaneda.”

Then she tilted her head.

“Is that so?” she inquired, as quietly as usual.

Which was really relieving, because an one-sided conversation probably wouldn’t have gotten them very far.

“Mmhm… He’s your friend too, isn’t he?”

Makiko looked away for a second, as if asking herself, and then back at Kei.

“I think so…” she muttered “I-I mean… I’d like to be his friend, but I don’t know if he… um… I never asked…”

“Well, it’s never too late.” replied Kei “He cares about you a lot, so I’m sure he’d like to be your friend.”

And that rather seemed to let her progress even more, because it actually made Makiko smile faintly.

“And so would I…” she added, which in turn made the child switch to a more intrigued expression “Listen, Makiko, I know how you must be feeling. Kaneda has told me some things, he’s worried… and I’m worried too, so I want to help you…”

Then Makiko shrank again.

“What do you mean? What did Mister Kaneda say…?”

And Kei acknowledged just how difficult this would soon become.

“He said…”

She was still treading as lightly as she could, but already sensing that something, perhaps everything would go wrong, regardless of her efforts.

“…that you blame yourself for some things.”

_Crack._

“I… What…?”

“He told me that some bad things happened, and that you think it’s your fault, because you got mad… Is it true?”

Makiko looked down, and put her arms around herself just like before, as if shielding herself.

“It’s okay, Makiko.” continued Kei, promptly softening her tone “You’re not in trouble, trust me.”

“I didn’t want to…” muttered Makiko, making her want to get closer, reach out for her.

And she tried, but the child recoiled away, so abruptly that she stood up.

_Crack._

“I know you didn’t…” replied Kei, standing up herself “Sometimes we just… get so mad we lose control, and do bad things… but that doesn’t mean we’re bad. That doesn’t mean _you’re_ bad, okay? It was still an accident…”

Then Makiko frowned. Seemingly getting on the defensive, seemingly guessing where the conversation was going.

“I-I don’t like this…”

“You just wanted her to leave you alone, didn’t you? You just wanted her to…”

_Crack._

“I don’t like this! Get away!”

“…get away, yes…”

_Crack._

“Stop…”

“And I understand, Makiko. I really understand…”

_Crack. Crack. Crack._

“I said _stop_!”

And she was already tearing up, shaking helplessly…

“What the _hell_ ’s going on here!?”

And catching Kaneda’s attention.

“ _Mister Kaneda!_ ”

Kei turned, as Makiko dashed to his side and clung to him.

“Kei, what the _fuck_ are you doing?” he continued, reaching down to place a reassuring hand on the child’s head.

“Yeah, what’s going on here?” repeated Kai, approaching from behind “Why is Makiko crying?”

Kei maintained her composure, and went straight to the point.

“She’s scared. Scared of what she did.”

“ _NO!_ ” snapped Makiko “ _I DIDN’T DO IT!_ ”

It was the first time she was raising her voice, and in the most startling manner.

_Crack. Crack. Crack. Crack. Crack._

Kaneda was certainly bewildered, and so was Kai.

“What? What didn’t you do?” he inquired, and it was then that both of them noticed.

It was then that they noticed the cracks.

And Kaneda suddenly realized.

“… _The building wreckage!?_ ”

Then the window shattered in its entirety.

Right when Makiko broke down into disconsolate wailing.


	8. Concentration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang decides what to do with the new psychic child and Kaneda suffers some more.

Kaneda took the received can of fruit juice from the vending machine and went back towards Makiko, to then sit next to her.

She was once again curled up, with her legs tucked against her chest, and still looking quite dishevelled.

Kaneda then opened the can for her, and handed it over. She took it, and paused for a moment before having a sip.

“Well, that was something…” commented Kai, while watching the scene from a distance “I guess this is gonna change things up a little, huh?”

Kei nodded.

She was watching them as well.

“I always had a feeling…” she sighed.

Kaneda seemed to be talking to Makiko, most likely trying to comfort her. Makiko wasn’t responding, however.

“Do you think the higher-ups know about this?” inquired Kai, with a bit of concern, that Kei immediately dispelled.

“They definitely don’t, they already would have locked her away otherwise. We might be the only ones who know, as of now… and I would like it to stay that way.”

“Yeah, I’m with you…”

“We _cannot_ allow any more Akiras.”

“ _Yeah_ , I’m with you on that one too.”

Kaneda was once again putting a hand on Makiko’s shoulder.

There was a gentle breeze and a clear sky. The roof had never looked so peaceful.

“…So what are we gonna do?” continued Kai.

Kei had to take some seconds to ponder.

“We can’t let her go…” she said, and then quickly rephrased “I mean, she _has_ to go, but she can’t go alone. It could be dangerous.”

“Considering what already happened to a good handful of people, it really could.” assented Kai, pretty firmly.

They couldn’t allow any more Yamagatas either.

“So one of us will have to keep both her and others safe.” determined Kei.

Then they turned back to the scene and saw Makiko talking again, as Kaneda smiled rather sadly.

The official discussion came hours later, as soon as the child was successfully put to sleep.

The dinner dishes were still in the sink, the television was still off, and the trio was still sitting at the table.

They all were looking quite contemplative.

Especially Kaneda.

“You two…” he mused, with an intent frown “You two just… _read_ each other up, didn’t you? Both of you just _knew_ from the get-go, didn’t you?”

Kei was frowning a little herself.

“Once you experience this kind of energy, you learn to recognize it anywhere…” she replied “I’m not sure if she did though, but judging by how threatened she seemed to feel, it’s possible.”

“So you _did_ know.” continued Kaneda, staring at her almost demandingly “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“Because I had _no way_ to prove it, Kaneda.” stated Kei, without batting an eyelid “It’s something I _feel_ , something entirely mental. I could have imagined it. I could have been getting influenced by the past, just like you…”

Kaneda sighed.

“Alright, whatever…” he concluded, running a hand through his hair “Let’s just figure out how to deal with this now.”

“Yeah, about that…” intervened Kai “We sorta talked it out earlier with Kei, and we think that no one else should know about this, that it could be risky, so one of us should go with Makiko and keep an eye on her.”

“And it should be you.” added Kei.

“That’s just what _she_ thinks.” clarified Kai, making her turn and cross her arms.

“Didn’t you agree with me on that part too?” she retorted.

“ _Maybe_ , but shouldn’t we let Kaneda decide if he’s okay with it?” replied Kai, also crossing his arms, seemingly in return.

“You mean if I’m okay with just leaving you guys behind when we’re on the verge of war?” scowled Kaneda “I worry about Makiko too, I really do, but you can’t just ask me to do that!”

“She tore down a _building_ , Kaneda, we’re talking about public security here.” persisted Kei “And her own security too, because if we let her go and potentially cause another disaster, who do you think will end up investigating and capturing her for study…?”

“………”

Kaneda tensed up even more than before, and frowned even more sharply than before.

“I know you think she trusts Kaneda more than any of us, Kei…” intervened, once again, Kai “And maybe you’re right, but… I’ve been taking care of her without a problem, I think I _could_ pull it off myself…”

Kei just gave him a doubting look in response.

But she wasn’t doubting his capability. She was actually concerned.

“ _Could you?_ ” she replied “Could you supervise a volatile psychic individual with no repercussions?”

“Well, what makes you think Kaneda could do it any better?” he continued, getting slightly irritated, but then rushing to restrain himself “…You’re making it sound like she’s not just a poor scared kid... She won’t cause any more trouble if she can help it, I know she wouldn’t want to…”

And those words, along with the wistful expression he was now showing, were enough to make Kaneda react.

“Kai…”

Because he could guess what he was thinking.

“Kai, no…”

_Tetsuo was just a poor scared kid too._

“It’s okay, Kaneda, really!” replied Kai, turning to him with a resolute smile “We’ve been fine so far, haven’t we? It’s gonna be alright!”

“ _No_ , it’s not okay!” exclaimed Kaneda.

Because he had been the one.

He had been the one who had saved her. He had been the one who had brought her without asking.

_He was the one who had been doing this for Tetsuo’s sake._

It was _his_ responsibility. It had always been.

And Kai was just doing it so he wouldn’t have to, Kai was just doing something for him _again_.

“Kaneda…” muttered Kei, as he promptly straightened up.

“No, I get it…” he said “We seriously have no choice, it _has_ to be me. Because you already have your own little punks to look after, and you already had to put up with _enough_ of my shit. And I got myself into this. It’s _my_ problem.”

“Wh- _Really!?_ ” exclaimed Kai, almost slamming his hands on the table “We’re _friends_ , Kaneda! I haven’t been putting up with anything, what the _fuck_ are you even going on about!?”

“Yes, _exactly_. We’re friends.” replied Kaneda “That’s why I can’t let you keep doing so much for me, because I haven’t returned a _single damn thing_ and that’s not what friends do. So shut up and accept it, because I’m not gonna change my mind.”

And it was so pathetic. It was so beautifully, ironically pathetic.

Almost like a karmic curse of sorts.

_Are you enjoying it…?_

He had become the weak one. He had become the one who would keep falling behind, getting the short end of the stick, needing others…

_Are you enjoying it, Tetsuo…?_

Maybe that was why he had taken Makiko in so willingly.

Because he couldn’t stand it anymore. He couldn’t stand not being the supporting, confident one anymore.

He had been yearning to relish it for at least one last time.

And now it would remain.

But it would never be as genuine as it used to be.

“Very well…” sighed Kei, a bit painedly “It’s settled then. But before we get any further, Kaneda… I want you to know that you _won’t_ be leaving us. This is not just a favor I’m asking you to do, it’s an _operation_. We haven’t been able to track the government’s activities in _years_ , for all we know they could be _still_ conducting those experiments… I want you to find someone who can tell us more about these powers, someone who can help Makiko and hopefully give us some advantage on the subject…”

Kaneda looked at her rather quizzically, as he gradually simmered down and resigned himself to his fate.

“Got it.” he replied “Do you, by any chance, have any idea of where I could start?”

“I do, actually.” nodded Kei “I’ve been trying to investigate on my own lately…”

And that wasn’t surprising at all, given how much she had been struggling to understand how her own powers worked.

The discussion continued calmly from that point on, without any more bumps.

The only underlying issue was the still present reluctance, but it kept getting ignored.

Even despite Kai’s disgruntled silence, it kept getting ignored.

It was for the greater good.


	9. Liberation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A more or less foregone conclusion.

Those images had truly left a mark.

A pretty impactful mark for a fleeting moment, taken from pieces of salvaged footage.

Perhaps a little too impactful, but that was just how he had interpreted it.

He was just a child at the time.

A child who possessed a couple of unusual abilities, such as bending cutlery and sometimes guessing what others were thinking.

Not very impressive, but still unusual enough to make his own family shun him.

They had told him that it wasn’t okay. That people would say he was cursed. That people would fear him, distance themselves from him.

It just wasn’t okay.

And, for a while, he believed it. He hung his head in shame, and repressed that shunned, unwanted part of himself.

Until _he_ appeared.

With his crimson cape and his ruthless glare.

 _Lord Akira_.

The one he had heard so much about. The one who had returned from death itself.

Not even getting his former remains buried and secured had stopped him. He had found a way.

He had found a way to acquire a new body, a new form, and continue his mission of purging the world.

And then presumably perish, once again, in that great ball of light and destruction.

The child hadn’t been around to see any of those things. They had come to him as stories, and later images from all that surviving evidence.

Those impactful images. The ones that finally confirmed that Lord Akira was real.

And Lord Akira had, once again, spared the world instead of obliterating it for good.

Because Lord Akira did actually have a merciful side.

Because Lord Akira used to be just a child with unusual abilities, just like himself.

A human who was given the power, the overwhelming responsibility of purging the world, of putting it out of its misery.

It was so tragic.

And it could have been himself.

Or rather, it could _still_ be himself.

Perhaps…

Perhaps he had been anointed by Lord Akira since his first incarnation, and indirectly witnessing the second one had been a fated reminder.

Perhaps Lord Akira was no longer able to take an earthly form, or it would at least take a bigger effort than before if he retried.

Perhaps Lord Akira just wanted him to understand that there was nothing wrong with him, that his abilities were no curse, but rather a blessing.

Either way, those images had motivated him. Those images had _inspired_ him.

The prospect of gathering enough power to subjugate everyone and everything in his path, just by looking at them…

It filled him with joy.

“ _It is important to consider that Lord Akira has caused great harm… but not everybody was harmed._ ” he said, with an eerie tranquility “ _It was a teaching. A warning. He has given us time to recover, and learn… but we did not listen. And that is why a second warning was required. A final warning. If a new strike is provoked, it will not be just a warning anymore. Lord Akira is losing his faith, and his human compassion. We must begin to move forward. We must begin to learn, for the world as we know it might be facing its very last chance. We must stop… this corruption…_ ”

Kai groaned, and reached out to change the channel, but Kei was still holding the remote.

“Oh, come on! Just how much more of this scumbag are we gonna have to sit through? Isn’t it already obvious that he’s either an idiot or high?” he complained.

“Koichi Uchida.” replied Kei, making him raise an eyebrow.

“Huh?”

“His name is Koichi Uchida. I usually wouldn’t even bother with someone who… preaches like this, but he seems to have a large following…” she explained, then turning away from the screen to look back at him “And enough influence to have his own block on television, which is very concerning if you ask me. Especially after some of those followers claimed that he has ‘miraculous abilities, granted by Lord Akira himself’…”

Kai observed her for some seconds before answering.

“You don’t think he could, like… actually have _those_ , do you?”

Kei frowned gravely.

“It’s possible.”

Her intuition was telling her so. And she hated it.

“Well, here we go again then!” sighed Kai, leaning back on his chair “Good thing Kaneda and Makiko must be miles away already…”

And now Kei was the one raising her eyebrows, noticing that starkly bitter tone.

“…You’re still upset with Kaneda, aren’t you?” she inquired.

“Aren’t _you_?” he scoffed, crossing his arms behind his head “He said he would let us help him, and then bailed again! Because he’s too full of himself for that shit or whatever!”

“It’s just difficult for him…” she reflected, giving him that worried look that had been gradually becoming the norm “And we can’t keep pushing him, because that will only make him evade us even more. We have to be patient.”

“Maybe that’s why he left in the end, because he got sick of us…” he concluded, deflating into a sadder demeanor.

And Kei replied almost immediately, almost reassuringly.

“I wouldn’t put it like that.” she said “I do think he might have needed a breather, but not precisely from us. He might have been tired in general. He said it himself, there’s been a lot going on… He might have wanted to clear his mind, do some self-discovery… and finding Makiko might have been his cue.”

Kai had been slowly shifting his gaze from the floor to the ceiling while listening, as if processing her response thoroughly, to then finally turn back to her.

“…From destiny?”

Kei seemed to ponder for a bit, and then shrugged vaguely.

“Maybe. Who knows…”

And that clearly didn’t do much, because Kai looked back down.

He always had been the most optimistic of the three, even despite the fact he had endured his own share of hardships, but now he was starting to fracture.

And it was just discouraging to see.

So discouraging that it was making Kei become encouraging in return. It was making her want to keep trying to show, maybe even _welcome_ some optimism herself.

“Just wait, Kai, we will be okay.” she continued “Kaneda will be back, and he will be ready to accept our help by then. I’m sure of it…”

“……………..”

Kai looked back at her.

And he actually didn’t quite buy that, but smiled anyway. Slightly.

“Thanks, Kei…”

And Kei smiled as well, before turning back to the television, since something had just caught her attention.

Something behind the ghastly preacher that was still there, spewing nonsense.

“ _We must acknowledge our mistakes._ ”

It was a mural.

“ _We must acknowledge our corruption._ ”

A mural depicting a familiar looking figure.

“ _We must repent._ ”

A mural depicting an _unsettlingly_ familiar looking figure.

“ _We must submit, and beg…_ ”

With a crimson cape and a ruthless glare.

“ _…for Lord Akira’s divine salvation…_ ”

Then Makiko opened her eyes with a gasp.

She was back on the train.

And next to a mildly startled Kaneda.

“What? What is it?” he inquired, leaning forward “Bad dream?”

And the train wasn’t looking hazy anymore. The other three or four passengers weren’t creepy shadows anymore either.

Yet, she had to blink and look around to fully convince herself.

“Makiko…?”

She even stared at her hands, before eventually turning to him.

“Where are we, Mister Kaneda?” she inquired herself, and Kaneda checked through the window.

“Still pretty far, I think…” he replied “These guys just love living in the middle of nowhere.”

“I see…”

Then Makiko looked away again, and placed her hands on her lap while gently swinging her legs.

“Sooo…” continued Kaneda “Everything alright then? No bad dreams?”

And she shook her head.

She didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t want it to linger.

She had already hassled him enough.

“I was just wondering…” she began, but then trailed off.

Which naturally didn’t work, since Kaneda had already heard enough.

“Yeah? Wondering what?”

And Makiko could only shrink regretfully.

“Am I bad…?” she muttered.

And suddenly her surroundings were becoming hazy again.

“Miss Kei is your friend… Miss Kei is your friend, right? I got mad at her, I got mad at your friend…”

Suddenly she was catching glimpses of cracks. Cracks on the windows, cracks on the walls.

“And Mister Kaisuke got mad too…”

Where those real cracks? Was it her? Was it her again? Or was it just another dream?

“Mister Kaisuke got mad, I know…”

But she was awake…

“It was me…”

Was she dreaming awake?

“ _It was me_ …”

Then Kaneda touched her shoulder, and everything reshaped itself back to normal.

Makiko turned, just in time to meet his protective intent as he proceeded to put his arm around her.

“No, you’re not.” he replied “You’re not bad. You just can do things that are hard to understand, and hard to handle. Anyone in that situation would get mad, hell, _I would_. It just sucks. But that’s _not_ you…”

And Makiko seemed to get it to some degree, but still tilted her head a little.

“That psychic shit, I mean… That doesn’t define you, okay? If you _can_ blow someone up but you _don’t want_ to, that’s what matters. What you do with it, or what you don’t do…”

That was what those weird kids had said back then, wasn’t it? Something along those lines.

“And what you already did is in the past.” he continued “You’re sorry and you don’t want to do it again. And that’s what matters.”

And Makiko was so grateful for it.

Makiko was so relieved, so moved, that she decided to cast the awkward hesitation aside and outright hug him.

“ _Oof!_ ” smiled Kaneda, taken by surprise but then promptly hugging her back “It’ll be okay, we’ll be okay…”

“Thank you for being my friend, Mister Kaneda…” she muttered.

And he could feel his heart shuddering, as the train kept advancing through the countryside.

Until the countryside turned into a rocky bank, and the train turned into flowing water.

And now it was a stream.

A stream that was still advancing with the same steadiness, before the concentrated gaze of a woman.

A young woman wearing a modest robe, and calmly kneeling on the shore.

“There you are.” said an incoming second woman, who was also wearing a modest robe “I knew you’d be here. You’ve been acting strange all morning.”

“I told you she had a feeling, a gut feeling.” added a third woman, approaching from behind, and _also_ wearing a modest robe.

“I think you mean _premonition_.” corrected the second woman, and the third woman shrugged.

“Gut feeling, premonition, same concept.” she said, putting her hands on her hips as she turned to the first woman “So? What is it?”

And then the first woman seemed to react, even though she was still facing away from them.

“Someone’s coming.” she said.

The second woman raised an eyebrow.

“Who?” she asked.

“A man.” answered the first woman “He’s dressed in leather, and looks conflicted. I believe he comes from the city.”

“The city!?” exclaimed the third woman “My _goodness_ , that’s a long way! What could he be seeking in this neck of the woods?”

“Guidance.” answered, once again, the first woman.

“Of course…” sighed the second woman “They’re all the same, always bringing their urban problems and their suffocating urban energy with them.”

“Not for him, though.” clarified the first woman “There’s a child with him.”

And then she frowned.

“A child, alright…” said the third woman, rubbing her chin “And what’s this child like?”

Then the first woman began to stand up.

“Anomalous.” she stated, making the third woman blink in astonishment.

“ _What?_ ” she mouthed.

“You’ll have to be more specific than that.” added the second woman, in a slightly annoyed manner.

“I can’t. I’m sorry.” replied the first woman, as she finally turned around “There’s definitely a disruption, though. That’s what will bring them here.”

“Well, in that case…” said the third woman “Let’s do our best to help, yes?”

“Hmph…” scowled the second woman “They better don’t cause any trouble.”

“Oh, Miki, you’re always so sweet to outsiders.” jeered the third woman, and the second woman just gave her a stern look.

“It’s called _being careful_ , Mozu. Maybe you should try it sometime.” she replied.

Then the first woman approached, pressing her palms together as if praying, or begging.

“I know it would be hard for you two, but could you _please_ not do this now?” she said “We might be about to confront a serious situation, so we have to focus.”

“Right, right…” said the third woman, also known as Mozu “Sorry, Sakaki. It’s just so fun to tick her off… but yeah, you can count on me. This could be our most interesting mission so far!”

“Sorry, Sakaki.” repeated the second woman, also known as Miki “I can’t speak for _her_ , but I will stay alert.”

“Yes. Thank you. Let’s return then.” concluded the first woman.

Also known as Sakaki.

And they did indeed return, quickly and resolutely.

There was so much to do, and so little time, but at least it was a sunny day.


	10. After Credits Scene

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A brief epilogue featuring a little discovery.

“Here you go.” said Sakaki, setting down a steaming cup.

“What is it?” asked Makiko, tilting her head at it.

“Lavender.” answered the priestess, with a secure smile “It has soothing properties.”

And she clearly meant well. She clearly wouldn’t hurt her, but Makiko still couldn’t help feeling a little uneasy when Kaneda wasn’t around. Maybe she was too used to his presence, to the way he would always look out for her.

“It’s alright, Mister Kaneda is still here.” added Sakaki, as if guessing her thoughts, which effectively made her blink in surprise “He’s just talking with my companions right now, making some arrangements…”

Makiko shrank, and timidly took the cup to then blow on it before taking a quiet sip.

Sakaki kept observing her collectedly, even despite the latent disturbance she could still sense, lurking in the child’s apprehensive demeanor.

“Is he your friend?” she inquired, since Kaneda had already stated that he wasn’t her father, which she had already been suspecting anyway.

Makiko nodded.

“I see.” she continued, her hands neatly resting on her lap “How did you meet? May I know?”

Makiko took another sip, seemingly pondering.

“…He saved me.”

Then Sakaki’s smile widened, tenderly.

“Is that so?” she said, and Makiko almost smiled back, but then looked down rather somberly instead.

“Did he tell you already? Did he tell you what happened?” she asked.

Sakaki shook her head.

“No use dwelling on the past. What he cares about, what _we_ care about, is what you are now.” she replied.

Makiko was frowning, but slightly.

“It’s serious, though…” she muttered “And it was bad… and I would have… I would have got hurt too, if he didn’t come…”

“But he did.”

Makiko blinked again, looking back at the priestess. At her contemplative gaze.

“Do you think you might have _wanted_ him to be there? To come to your aid?” she inquired.

Makiko was fiddling with her fingers.

Wondering.

“…What are dreams made of?” she inquired, in return.

And since Sakaki didn’t want to waste time questioning, she just went along with it.

“Usually memories.”

Then Makiko’s frown became more apparent, her features sharpening into a concentrated expression.

“So… if you see someone in a dream, does that mean it’s a memory? Does that mean you must have seen that someone before?” she continued.

“Have you seen Mister Kaneda in your dreams before meeting him?” assumed Sakaki.

Makiko looked away for a moment.

Then she nodded again.

“Well, that’s actually quite common in our field. It’s called precognition.” explained Sakaki “You simply foresaw the day you would meet him.”

But Makiko was still frowning.

And taking yet another thoughtful sip, while once again looking back at her.

“It wasn’t the future, though…” she said.

“Oh? Is that so?” replied the priestess, still pretty nonchalantly.

“It wasn’t the future, because…” fumbled Makiko, now fiddling with a strand of her hair “Because Mister Kaneda was… Mister Kaneda was…”

“Looking younger?” assumed, once again, Sakaki.

“Different…” continued Makiko “So different…”

“People can look really different when they’re younger. Especially if they have gone through a lot.” said Sakaki, as the child placed a hand on a temple, as if trying to make sense of what she had been saying.

“But I know it was him… How do I know it was him?” she asked, her tone becoming nervously confused.

“Maybe you _did_ call him after all. Maybe that was how much you wanted to know who that boy in your dreams was.” concluded Sakaki.

Which only disconcerted Makiko more.

“But _how do I know it was him?_ ” she repeated, and Sakaki seemed to pause.

To actually think about it.

Since it was certainly something she had never witnessed before.

Makiko decided to finish the cup, figuring it would take a long while for her to offer a satisfying answer.

However, Sakaki ended up answering sooner than expected.

“Have you ever heard of…” she began, tentatively “…the transmigration of souls…?”


End file.
